Sunday afternoon my boys were playing outside when they got somewhat of an unexpected surprise. As they were laughing and jumping on their trampoline they noticed something slowly floating toward them from the heavens. As it got closer they excitedly waited for it to hit the ground and then grabbing it up they quickly ran into the house to show me their discovery. It was a plain, white sheet of paper with a simple, but meaningful sentence written across it in blue marker, “Happy 50th Anniversary Charles and Patricia Fields, Stanford, Kentucky”.
Apparently someone in Stanford had released the balloons as part of an anniversary celebration and it made its way to our yard. The boys were just amazed and thought it was so cool they had actually seen something fall from the sky. The part of their finding that made me smile was the fact that a couple was able to proudly say they had been married for fifty years.
Part of my job at the newspaper is typing up the social news we receive such as weddings, birthdays, births, and my favorite, anniversaries. I love to read the announcements from couples who have been married for several years. With divorce being such a common word and decision these days it is refreshing to read the good news of a couple that has stuck it out, made it work, and succeeded.
It was somewhat ironic that the boys’ spotted their message from the sky on Sunday because that was also the day my parents celebrated their 36th year of marriage. They have always been such an inspiration to me in life and definitely in my marriage.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not naïve enough to think they have never had their arguments. As I have mentioned before fights and quarrels in our home when I was a child was evidenced only by the eerie silence that prevailed when mom and dad were in the same room together. I always knew they had settled their differences when daddy would resume his kind hearted teasing at mom. Their disagreements were few and far between, but the way they handled them taught me several priceless lessons.
I learned that you don’t show yourself in front of your children. Adult arguments should be taken care of in private and not on display for young children to behold. I have admittedly shot back at my husband from time to time in front of my boys before catching myself, but we try to discuss things behind closed doors. My boys are not responsible for the differences between their father and me and as their parent I should not place that burden on their shoulders. My parents never made me feel like an argument was my fault.
My husband and I have been married for nine years and each one of those has been a learning experience for us both. I think all newlywed couples remain in that honeymoon stage for at least six months, maybe longer, but then the reality of living with someone who is most likely your total opposite starts to wear on you both.
This is where those infamous, “In good times and in bad”, vows come into play. For example, it drives me insane for my husband to leave more than one pair of shoes by the door, but it also drives him insane for me to put them up as soon as he takes them off. Marriage is a delicate game of give and take. It is better to give more than you take. Though I think an extra verse should be added to the marriage vows saying, “To have and to place in a sleeper hold until they come around to your way of thinking.”
I am a firm believer that husbands and wives should be best friends, keeping no secrets from each other. Secrets in a marriage are the kiss of death. If you can’t be honest with the person you vowed to have and to hold for the rest of your life then who can you be honest with?
Though there have been times that I have really not liked my husband, I have always loved my husband. My mom and dad have taught me through the years that it is okay to have differences, but it is how you settle them and deal with their causes is what is going to define the success of your marriage.
In closing I want to send out a very Happy Anniversary to Charles and Patricia Fields of Stanford, Kentucky. Most importantly I want to say I love you to my parents who I am very proud of. Thank you for being an inspirational example in your faith and in your marriage.
Have a great week everyone and may God bless you and keep you safe.